Weird pregnancy fact of the week...

The baby is about the length of a Tic Tac and about as heavy as an eyelash!

We saw our little Tic Tac today; and the little flicker of their heartbeat. A lovely sight. I'm actually two days out would you believe. Don't understand how that worked out but there we go. So I'm 7 weeks on September 1st! Lovely jubbly.

7 weeks...

Although it doesn't sound very far, I'm 7 weeks already (33 to go!). It seems like an age to us as I found out very early (as in before 4 weeks - weird, never done that before!). I had a few panics on and off but then a wave of peace flows over me and a confidence in God knowing that He is over all. He has ordained this child for His time which is, quite frankly, jolly exciting. And in human terms, a little bad timing as it's my cousins' wedding a week before I'm due over in Cambridge. The other awesome thing is this; this baby that is being knitted together in my womb, ready to live out God's plans and purposes, is due a year & week to the day that we lost Emmanuel. I was a little down for a few months everytime I found I wasn't pregnant but His timing is the greatest. And in the past couple of months, there has been such healing and such joy God has granted us, that this pregnancy alone is testimony to that.

Metal mouth...

I feel as if I have one of the above rammed in my mouth. I finished a course of antibiotics on Friday and one of the side effects of taking these tablets is a funny metallic taste in your mouth. Kind of like if you've just had a swig of milk? Or something. Anyway, this should have subsided by Sunday but alas, it hasn't so I imagine this is a new symptom and one I've never had before! Grim. Still, shan't complain. This is a happy pregnancy!

18 week miracle...

When I was expecting Josiah, we went to Soul Survivor with our youth at church. I was nearly 18 weeks pregnant at this point. One evening, during worship (we were singing Healer at the time) I felt my tummy get hot. In fact, it was radiating heat. John felt it and looked a little shocked. I was starting to think I should visit St Johns Ambulance as that can never be normal! But we figured God was doing something and didn’t think anymore about it. But it was weirdly hot.

A while ago, we had a forerunner from the World Trumpet Mission come visit BTC called Nicodemus. Lovely man, had a fire for God like I have never seen. Repeatedly told us he loved Jesus, he was so cute you could just put him in your pocket! Probably shouldn't say that about such a man of God. But that’s an aside. He preached one Sunday and God spoke to both John and I that day; when we got home we were discussing this. That time at Soul Survivor and the heat radiating from my stomach suddenly came to my mind. Then God revealed something; I was at the gestation that we lost Emmanuel. He was changing the shape of my uterus to allow Josiah to grow into the bouncing boy we eventually welcomed into the world! How awesome is that!? Even more awesome, is that due to the shape of my womb, babies are always born underweight. And he came out 8lbs 15oz! We are praising God always for this miracle and know that His hand is over this pregnancy. We expect miracles!

Tea and coffee etc...

So while I'm not overly wild about coffee currently, I'll still have the odd cup. And I still enjoy tea! I am in shock. In both my previous pregnancies, tea and coffee were the first things I went off. This one, not so. I'm not complaining, after all, I will be most pregnant through the winter months therefore will require occasional hot drinks.

This pregnancy has been amazing so far. Granted I'm only 6 weeks or so but at this point in the last ones, I felt rough as. God has been good. I've been very tired but not enough that I can't have fun with Josiah. I'm thankful that he's flexible enough to have time out with me sometimes if I literally don't have the energy. For example, the other day (yes, I know it's only end of August) as it was cold, rainy and miserable outside we sat on the sofa with our cups of tea and a biscuit watching The Snowman (his choice). It was just lovely! So even if there are days where my back is a little jippy, we can still share lovely moments like that.

A contradiction in terms...

John came home tonight and asked how I was. I replied; 'I'm feeling so sick, I've been stuffing my face all evening'.

You really do wonder sometimes...

Copycat...

This pregnancy has been sooo similar to when I was expecting Josiah it's just bizarre. Very comforting but so strange how alike.

Example #1: in the evenings, come 7pm, I have been feeling freezing cold. As in, I have to get our big, fluffy throw cold, while wearing a jumper etc. It's not right. While we were lounging on the sofa one evening, I had a 'eureka' moment, in which I remembered I had exactly the same 'problem' early on with Josiah. I can't even explain why it happens, it's just one of those things. Amusing.

Example #2: I had another 'eureka' moment while we were in the car on the way to swim one evening. I have been ever so slightly jumpy, for want of a better word, wherever we drive. Not just in our car either. No offence to anyone at all, but this is my other weird pregnancy thing. I get incredibly nervous in cars!! I was convinced that John was about to plough straight into the parked car as we were heading down the road or drive straight into an island on the way to swimming.

Danica Patrick...

Otherwise known as the hormones racing around my body. (Danica Patrick is an American racing car driver). It's been crazy to say the least. In my last two pregnancies, I wasn't anywhere near as highly strung/unhinged as I have been in this one. It's been pretty tiring to be honest. It's amusing in the grand scheme of things I suppose. Poor John. Tiredness has been pretty much as pregnancy would have it; very tired all the time, waking up feeling as if I've slept five minutes, you know the score. I'm grateful that Josiah still has a good nap in the day and he's happy to go down morning or afternoon so I can sort of pick and choose, depending on whether I can or can't keep my eyes open.

I feel so calm about this pregnancy. Even though I'm supposed to see my midwife every other week (a lot of hassle but I wouldn't have it any other way - I just love babies and talking about babies and producing babies!!) as this pregnancy is classed high-risk, that doesn't bother me in any way shape or form. So I'm thankful and grateful to God for giving us such peace and faith in Him about everything.

Josiah...

The little treasure.

One of the reasons I knew I was pregnant was his sudden fascination with my stomach. It's eerie really. The day I found out, I was slouching on the sofa and he was running around the living room. All of a sudden, he stopped, slowly walked over and lifted my top up as if he thought I was hiding something. Then he pulled it back down very quickly, then lifted it again. Then he poked my tummy with one finger. Then pushed on it with his whole hand. Then starting banging my tummy with his hands, put his face against it and ran off.

Funny one.

Something to share...

We are thrilled to share with our wonderful family and friends that we have a baby on the way! This announcement has been sitting in my drafts on this blog since 4 weeks and I have been busting to tell as you can imagine, but we thought it best to just check everything was OK before blabbing. Which, glory to God, it is and believe me, we will keep you very updated. We have been blessed with such joy and peace in this pregnancy and we can feel God’s hand over it so tangibly.

When we said goodbye to little Emmanuel, it was the hardest thing we have ever had to do. We knew that while God was refining us like silver (Psalm 66.10), He had bigger plans that were better for us than our ideas. He sometimes uses events like we experienced to reveal things. One of the things He revealed through surgery after the delivery of Emmanuel, was the weird shape of my uterus. It’s called a bicornuate uterus (or a heart shaped womb – when the consultant told me this, I swooned and thought it must be prophetic. Hahaha!) Instead of it being pear shaped, it’s shaped slightly like a rams head, with two horn shaped bits at the top so the success of pregnancies is purely dependant on where the baby implants. There's nothing that can be done as it's congenital BUT God overrules. Always. Just as He has shown this year.